Thanksgiving Smackdown

My students' final paper was due before Thanksgiving weekend - a tactical move on my part, since I would prefer not to read papers that have been thrown together in a haze of tryptophan and football. Still, they whined that they wanted to have the weekend to work on the paper. The conversation in class went like this:

Them: If you give us the weekend, the papers will probably be better.
Me: In my professional experience, you are wrong about that. Also, do you really want to have the paper hanging over you during Thanksgiving?
Them: Do YOU really want to grade papers during your Thanksgiving?
Me: I'm Canadian. I had my Thanksgiving a month ago. Nice try.
Them: You mean you aren't going to celebrate Thanksgiving because you're Canadian?
Me: I will have a meal where I eat too much, but that won't interfere with my professional life.
Them: But don't you want to watch football?
Me: I find few things less interesting than football.
(General shock and confusion. Muffled sound of student saying "That's twisted!")

Them: But I bet you like hockey!
Me: No.
(Stunned silence)
Them: Do you like to watch any sports?
Me: I enjoy watching the stranger Olympic events, like Luge and Curling. However, the Olympics will not take place until next semester. Your paper is still due on Tuesday, y'all.

Frontier Bowling

Last Sunday I enjoyed a bowling experience with some colleagues. We discussed department politics while the local Postal Workers Tournament raged around us.

Check out my awesome "Cobra" bowling shoes.

Note that the landscape in the background is made of carpet. This has the effect of controlling the sound levels, while also contributing to the establishment's already notable kitsch value. There is an identical carpet landscape on the opposite wall, except it has an American flag in place of the Texas one. We wouldn't want to forget where we are.